If The First Time Having Sex With Someone New Isn’t Great, Is That A Red Flag?

Maybe it’s been a while for you, and you’re low-key worried you’ve forgotten how to hook up. Or maybe it’s been a long time since your partner has gotten it on, and they end up finishing more quickly than they’d like. It’s also probable that you’ve both been building the moment up in your minds, so when it finally comes, the reality might not live up to your expectations. Whatever the reason, your first time having sex with someone new can be intimidating. But if the initial hookup isn’t great, does that mean it won’t get better.

The answer is no, so don’t freak out. If your first time having sex with a new partner is awkward, uncomfortable, or simply not as enjoyable as you’d like, that isn’t necessarily a red flag. You shouldn’t judge your compatibility with someone on one sexual encounter, especially the first one. Nerves are normal, and can definitely lead to hesitation or a less-than-stellar performance. Plus, because the two of you aren’t yet familiar with each other’s likes and dislikes in bed, you can’t really expect it to be the best sex you’ve ever had. So if you plan to give it another go with this person, stay optimistic. Experts and “regular people” agree that when it comes to having better sex, practice makes perfect.