Halloween Hookups in the UK

If You’re Hoping To Get Lucky On Halloween, Read This.

1. Hallow-WIN: Getting Your Flirt On, Costume-Style

Halloween is typically a fun time to meet all kinds of new people — witches, ghosts, priests, policemen, aliens, celebrities, the front half of a horse, you name it. And, let’s be honest, a bodacious babe’s cool costume can be a great icebreaker, especially if you’re at one of those awesome parties with dry ice, and she’s dressed as Thor and wielding a hammer.

2. Hallow-FAIL: Using Her Costume As An Excuse For Harassment

But, overwrought icebreaker puns aside, lots of guys go too far when it comes to women’s costumes on Halloween. Just because she’s dressed up sexy doesn’t mean she wants you to touch her, tell her she’s a “slutty kitty cat” or spend the whole night staring at her because you haven’t seen a woman in Daisy Dukes since August. Women dress up for the same reason we do — to have fun being someone else for a night (even their favorite Transformers) and to be noticed. But just like literally every other situation ever, just because she’s wearing less than a full snuggie (and even if she’s wearing a snuggie) doesn’t mean she wants you to touch her or get all up in her personal space. If she does, she’ll let you know. Otherwise, just imagine you’re dressed up as Cool Hand Luke and play it cool.

3. Hallow-WIN: Hooking Up With Sexy Ghosts, Witches, Etc.

Meet someone hot at the party/club/watering hole/haunted house? See someone you already knew in a whole new light because of the incredibly detailed Zombie Anne Frank costume she was wearing? No judgment. Human attraction is an art, not a science, man. Anyway, if she’s into it, then make it happen, Cap’n. (I assume what’s what you’re dressed as.) It’s 2019, and our social mores have progressed to a point where that kind of thing is totally chill.

4. Hallow-FAIL: Failing To Use Sexy Ghost/Witch Protection

Unless you’re dressed as the Incredible Naked Guy (and don’t… don’t do that), chances are your costume has enough hiding places to stash some condoms Gun slinger? Put ‘em in your holster. Your favorite Transformer? Put ‘em… in one of the boxes you covered your arms with. Progressive sexual health advocate? Just bring along a giant tub full of condoms to distribute. Having condoms on you could mean the difference between the awesomest Halloween you’ve ever had and the worst. You don’t want your bad decisions to come back and, uh, haunt you… right?

5. Hallow-WIN: Imbibing Potions, Brews And Slimes

Whether you’re a mummy, a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, Edgar Allen Poe, one half of a Mario/Luigi tag-team combo, or Zeus, alcohol is a great way to loosen up and enjoy yourself. There, we said it. Fall bears? Great. Wine? Classy. Jaegerbombs? Wouldn’t be our first choice, but you do you, back half of that horse.

Also, don’t forget to check out REAL SEX CONTACTS for more fun.